Women are beautiful. Men are handsome. Sex sells. These are the ingredients of an action packed movie or TV series designed to encourage viewers to watch. These are the same factors that can play a role in the interest of the opposite sex. The confidence of a man or the smile of a woman could blind a person into settling on their values. A thought comes to life, as questionable actions become normalized, then you find yourself in a lust bubble.
What is lust?
“For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world.” I John 2:16 NKJV
Our flesh is weak. What I mean is that our bodies have lustful desires. These feelings or appetites could control your life if you do not address them. In order to defeat lust you have to understand what it is. Lust is a spirit.
Despite what the world tells you, you cannot treat a spiritual problem with a worldly solution. Additionally, the world will not address lust as a problem as it is promoted through music, movies, social media and many others forms of entertainment. If your eyes are open you will see the agenda that is introducing our preteens and teenagers to programming that will expose them to situations that they are not ready for.
As they grow to become adults, they fail to realize that they are an active participant in a war. A war that can only be fought in the Spirit.
“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.” Ephesians 6:12 NKJV
Many of us find out we are in this battle as we grow closer to God. Others may not realize their current dilemma due to a lack of discernment. Imagine bullets flying past your ears with buildings crumbling due the dropping of bombs. Debris falls within inches of your feet but you can’t see the smoke in front of your face. There is a battle for your life and you need to understand how to fight it. Before we get into the strategy of how to fight, lets discuss why it began in the first place.
A look can be as dangerous as committing the sin
“The lamp of the body is the eye. If therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light.” Matthew 6:22 NKJV
You see her and she sees you. But you don’t stop there. You fantasize. You imagine.
“But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Matthew 5:28 NKJV
The stage is set for lust to grow. The two of you are on one accord. Sin has a chance to be born.
I’ve heard the statement “I’m grown” one too many times as it pertains to a person’s choice to sleep around. God has given us the Bible which documents how we should live a Christ like life. He has also allowed us to have free will. The problem many do not realize is how sexual immorality will lead you down a path that was never intended for you.
“Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.” I Corinthians 6:18 NKJV
Think of all the relationships that were created on the foundation of sex. Lust has a way of either comprising our values or restricting our ability to make sound decisions. It’s like being under the influence because you are.
Syngin Colchester of ‘90 Day Fiancé’ admitted that he was in a lust bubble when he met a young lady, Tania, at a bar in South Africa. Tania and Syngin would eventually get married and discover that they had two different expectations on what their marriage would look like. They struggled to get past the lust induced passion that set the tone for a relationship built on living in the moment. In a conversation with his friends, Syngin stated that “good sex can make you feel in love” referring to the origins of their relationship.
Imagine starting a business with a business partner. You register the name of your business with the state it will be operating out of. All of the licenses and fees are paid. You are fully insured and bonded. The business loan was just approved; now you are ready to draft a marketing plan. Your business partner wants to advertise custom surfboards to surfboard shops in all beach towns. You have a bewildered look on your face because you started a business to sell fork lifts.
Lust will take you to a place without the realization that you were on a ride. Just think about that. You can spend years with a person in a relationship built on lust. And find yourself waking up one morning wondering how you got there. Or, you realize that you have nothing in common with the person. You end up with a bewildered look on your face as you wonder what to do next.
The flesh wars with the Spirit
“For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.” Galatians 5:17-25 NKJV
We fight lustful desires by reading the word, the Bible and prayer. Fasting is also a key component because it forces you to deny the flesh. The key thing to remember about a fast is to pray and read during the fast to seek clarity from God.
You have to know who you are. What I mean is, the enemy, Satan knows what you struggle with. He knows what your fleshly desires are. Remember that you are not what you struggle with, you are healed in Jesus name.
If you have ever struggled with pornography, masturbation or sexual fantasies you need to identify what you are doing to allow these spirits in your life. For example, social media is a “gateway drug”. It has the potential to expose you to beautiful men and women. You can spend hours staring at videos and pictures. Those images will send you into fantasy and you can begin to lust after the individual. You can become enthralled and find release in pornography and masturbation.
We have the ability to fight against the carnality of the flesh. The question is, do you have the tools for the everyday battle?
“Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints.” Ephesians 6:14-18 KJV
We all will be tempted. Know that you will always have a way out.
“No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.” 1 Corinthians 10:13 NKJV
Even Jesus was tempted but it is important to understand that he responded with the living Word.
“Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.” Matthew 4:1 NKJV
Your change today will free someone tomorrow
Being drawn into lust will turn into sin. Sin, when it is finished can turn into death. Just because you have physical life doesn’t mean you can’t be spiritually dead.
“Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.” James 1:15 KJV
An accountability partner can go a long way in helping you steer clear from situations that promote lust. I’m not talking about people who have the same struggle. I am speaking of brothers and sisters in Christ that can not only talk you out of making a bad choice but one that can also pray with you. Of course you have to be a willing participant in the transformation.
You are not a failure. You will overcome. This challenge will make you stronger. In fact, your testimony will help free someone who struggles in the same area.
Start with God. Know that he loves you. He’s waiting on you to learn that you are more than sex. Your worth cannot be measured by how someone looks at you. You are more than fleshly and worldly desires. You are beautifully and wonderfully made. The most beautiful feature of your body is your heart. A heart for God will help you understand who you are. An understanding of the Word will reveal how to treat your body, the temple. The Holy Spirit will give you the discernment to stay out of a lust bubble.
Abigail Grimes says
Great article! On point and VERY relevant to what’s happening today! Thank you for sharing your thoughts and wisdom!!
Brandon “B.Saved” Bennett says
Great article!! I think one of the major parts of dealing with lust is acknowledging that it is a problem. Not denying it and just writing it off as something that just normally happens. We have to be like David when he sinned due to lust and acknowledged his transgression before the Lord as well as confess to accountable brothers. Denial of it will keep you trapped thinking and believing that it’s not really that bad, while all along you’re being lead down a road that will separate you from a true relationship with God Himself.